Archive | July 2013

Remembering the wounds and brokenness

Today I have been reflecting on how deeply wounded and so broken I was 5 years ago. I felt lost and had no hope. After my divorce from a marriage that lasted 22 years, I gave up. I was angry, hurt and  felt abandoned, rejected, and not worthy. This all changed when I surrendered my will to God’s will. I discovered and learned how to nurture and love myself because I was seeking acceptance, love and approval from others, placing myself in relationships with people that were just as wounded and broken as I was. I took about a year off from relationships, and started to spend some “me” time. This in its self was an amazing adventure. I dealt with past wounds from when I was 7 years old and all through now adulthood. (old and new wounds). I thought I was doing  pretty well living with these wounds and they didn’t affect me (Wrong). They were tucked and hidden so deep that they became numb. Through my healing process, they each surfaced one by one, remained for a time as I relived each one  again, Sometimes I cried uncontrollably, at other times I was angry. I allowed myself to feel angry and sad. I faced every one in the face as if it happened today, I was able to release all the feelings I had penned up inside. Today I feel healthy and free. I no longer have bondage, I’m no longer insecure or afraid. Today I’m happy to say that I feel not only free and healthy, also secure, loved, and living bold. Through this life experience I have the opportunity to help others in this same situation. I walk along side woman that are lost like I was, and very wounded and broken. I find by me being there for them and available 24/7, (whether its to cry together or just have a simple chat) it brings me such joy to my heart that I’m able to encourage them to hold God’s hand, not to give up, and press through the fire. This I share as its been very enlightening. I ask you ” How are You with yourself? Are you seeking love, acceptance, and approval from others? Or are you living a bold life feeling free and loved? If you would like to share your story, I would love to hear about it. either comment or email me @thebeautyinabutterfly@gmail.com, Blessings!  Lourdes

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Faith Hope & Love

I live with these three words in my heart, Faith, Hope and Love.

Hebrews 11:1

“Faith is the confidence that what we hope for will actually happen; It gives us the assurance about things we can not see.

Jeremiah 29:11

“For I know the plans I have for you “declares The Lord”, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.

1 Corinthians 13:13

“And now these three remain: Faith, Hope and Love. But the greatest of these is Love.

I believe having Faith, Hope and Love as I go through my days I find an amazing sense of peace, I focus on the little things that matter most to me. For instance… The birds singing, the beautiful butterflies, flowers and trees, my boys playing and laughing, a pleasurable walk, people I meet wherever I go, a simple greeting and smile to brighten someones day, a complement to someone, or just being mindful, keeping things simple and peaceful. This brings me so much joy and peace. Doing this for myself, I don’t think or worry of life circumstances or my busy schedule. I appreciate life and all the people I encounter. If your asking yourself “How and why does she seem so happy?”, well I can tell you for a long time I took people and things for granted, not that I didn’t appreciate them, Its because I always thought its normal to be nice and do things for others. But I learned I was wrong. It takes having compassion, caring and listening to others needs. To stop focusing on self and be that person to make a difference in this world. As I wake up each morning, I say… Thank you God for another day that I have a purpose for. I look forward to starting my day and ending it with a “Thank You”. Having Faith, Hope and Love is all I need to get through my days with a smile, a peaceful mind, and a happy heart. Try it. You will feel peace and joy. Its a beautiful feeling.  Blessings!

Despite Our Circumstances

When we understand God’s grace, surrender our will to His will, repent- we become understanding, forgiving,and approachable. Through our circumstances we become content instead of discouraged. we look at our circumstances and trials in a different perspective. We endure and persevere, He then gives us comfort and strength, our character changes, we become a new person, we find peace regardless of anything that’s going on around us. It’s all part of His plan for our lives so that we will discover our Life Purpose. Sometimes we get so stuck on our past and we have negative thinking, we feel discouraged, worthless. Here is where we need to do what we don’t want to do, complete surrender. Once we surrender our will to His will, we can be assured that the outcome is better than what we ask for. His will is for our good. He’s for us not against us. There is hope beyond our circumstances and we can live above them.  (Isaiah 40:31) “But those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles, they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not faint”.   “Wisdom is gained in knowing the ways of God, We see life from His point of view”   Blessings!

Working my way out of cocoon into becoming a Butterfly

I always loved butterflies and today I have an understanding why I love them so much. After discovering the process of a butterfly it gave me the understanding with where I was in my life and “who I am” today. I will explain for those of you who may not  know the process of a butterfly before it actually becomes a butterfly. So, before a caterpillar becomes a butterfly it prepares its cocoon as if it were dying, But what the caterpillar thinks is the end of its life, its actually “The Beginning”. It then sheds its skin which forms a chrysalis cocoon and goes inward for a few days. (Though for us in the process of life before discovering “Who we are”, (depending where you are in your life with yourself), it can take weeks, months or years). This process continues with it becoming a liquid (digestive soup). This liquid then chooses parts of the caterpillar to hold onto and kills the rest then creates new butterfly tissue. The butterfly then has to fight hard to get out of a the chrysalis (interesting thing is that if someone tries to help it during this process it dies). Its this process of fighting hard to get out that it gives the butterfly its strength and development that it needs to actually survive. Its then ready to learn to walk and fly. After learning about the process it takes before it becomes a Beautiful Butterfly, it was then I was able to say “I have been living as caterpillar, formed my cocoon, and have been in a puddle where I’m now fighting my way through (trials, circumstances all that life brings) learning and discovering more everyday of “Who I am”, I climbed out of what was holding me back, let go of what was not serving or supporting me, and now I’m able to fly, exploring all the beautiful new things life is bringing me. I’m enjoying every minute and embracing all the blessings in my life.  I would like to encourage you to discover where are you in your life? Are you a caterpillar knowing that its time to change and do something new? Are you paddling around in the puddle of the person you were trying to discover the person you were created to be? Or are you a butterfly thriving and soaring to new heights? For me… it seemed like I was waiting for affirmation on what to do next, looking at what lied before me, all the hard work, pushing and pressing through, knowing the pain it was going to cause from letting go, all the obstacles I was going to face (which I learned to embrace). I took the leap of faith and started to learn and unleash all I had hidden and stored inside to discovering “WHO I AM”. This has been a process, and all worthwhile. I embrace all of my life experiences, the good and the not so good (in which I would’t change) It is because of all these life experiences that I have the strength to keep moving forward, as I look upward reaching my dreams. I look  forward to sharing with you my journey as I continue walking, learning and growing experiencing my new heights. Blessings To All!