Archive | October 2013

What Am I Meant To Learn From All Of This?

I first started with prayer.I needed help in each moment to remember the greater purpose this is serving in my life. Though it has not been always easy, prayer has helped me realize that I don’t need to have all the answers. I can have faith that things are working out in my favor and that God is going to make this happen for the best. I’ve learned to give Him control of my life and learn to follow His lead. I also have recently touched on my evolving understanding of my ego and spirit (Few days ago). I began to realize that through this breakup, I had two thought sources. One seemed to come from just inside my ear and the other came from my gut. The ear/ego thoughts were generally painful and emotional and started with “I think” and the gut/spirit thoughts were calm and started with “I know”. Since my ego had expectations and attachments to what it thought our future was going to be, it was incredibly upset that life was not going according to its plan. But my gut at the same time knew that what was best for one of us, was best for us both. This distinction between the ego and spirit has been an incredible transformation in all areas of my life. After weeks of observation, I can now distinguish when a thought is coming from my ego or my spirit. Then I do my best to choose the course of action that is aligned with the spirit. If I’m having trouble with shaking an ego urge, Then I pray to my spirit for help. I’m nowhere close to being perfect at this but I am improving day by day. At this point and time (Remember its only been weeks), I have come to feel optimistic about the future for us both. I trust that our future is bright whether we are together or not. The relationship itself was never the source of the good in my life, but rather an extension/byproduct of doing my best and pursuing my purpose. Though the vision of my life included this relationship, I have faith that God’s plan for my life is much greater than I can imagine. So I’m not trying to fill in all the blanks anymore.

Some affirmations:

1) All pain passes eventually

2) I can’t always control what happens but I can control how I respond to it

3) I know now I can have hurt less and create even more possibilities for myself if I put more effort into completely letting go.

Advertisements